ivf cycle

The post below comes to us from Diana, a two-time previous donor with BHED.

Now, let’s get on to the business of having blood drawn during your cycle.  Sure, I recently discovered it’s a piece of cake to have a needle in my skin for a second during an injection, but what about a needle being nestled into my vein for more than a minute as my precious life force is drained from my body into a cold heartless vial?  This would be tricky.  For those of you who hate having blood drawn, you are not alone.  I was the girl who broke into a cold sweat, literally soaking my shirt the minute I sat in the strange school-desk chair, oddly appropriate as I would often be having an internal fit reminiscent of a 2nd grader, and was handed that ball to squeeze.  I hadn’t had blood taken in so long (and hardly remember the last go around after having fainted).  They call my name.  I walk over to what is referred to as the (ahem, cough, swallow) “Blood Station” with my iPod earphones in.

My deer in the headlights look is greeted by the kindest pair of eyes I’ve ever seen.  These eyes belong to Raul, the Phlebotomist.  He seems to notice my unease, perhaps my clenched fists and general lack of breathing or blinking, and says “I take it you’re not a fan of having your blood drawn?”  To which I say “Not a fan at all, maybe even a heckler” as a strange trail of nervous giggles leaks out of my clenched jaw.  I try to make jokes when I’m nervous, also to downplay how incredibly frightened I am, they’re also usually really horrible jokes as demonstrated.  But for some reason, Raul’s warm presence had me feel it was okay to just come clean, “I’m actually terrified of having my blood drawn.  In fact, it’s the only thing I’m afraid of.  Some people fear car accidents, life failure, earthquakes.  I fear sitting in that chair.  I usually pass out or vomit either before, during or after having my blood drawn.  In fact, I’ve avoided doing it for several years because I’m always so embarrassed by my fainting or throwing up.”  Wow, thanks for the biopic, Barbara Walters.  Raul is not at all put off by this, in fact, he appears to find this honesty refreshingly charming (this is what I tell myself after feeling like I just shared some sort of Judy Blume confessional diary entry).  He’s not looking at me like the high-maintenance mess that’s about to make his job a huge pain.  He puts his hand on my shoulder and says, “I’m really good, you won’t feel a thing.  Let’s have you lie down.”  I lay down and already feel 100 times better than I usually did in the chair.  I say, “Raul, I’m going to turn my music up really loud while you do this.”  He smiles and says, “No problem, do what you have to do.”  I turn on my music and the next thing I know Raul is telling me it’s over.  I couldn’t believe it.  I sat up and almost cried.  ”You’re the best Raul!  The best!  You’re the fastest blood-taker in the west!  You’re a blood-taking ninja!”  Raul was laughing, I was laughing.  It was a regular feel good Who’s the Boss episode where Raul lovingly pats me on the head and calls me “Saman-ta”.

So what made this go-around so different than previous blood draws?  Quite simply, being open and honest with the Phlebotomist about my fear.  For so long I had tried to”hide” it, as I was painfully embarrassed that a woman my age couldn’t handle what, in the grand scheme of things, is such a simple thing to do.  Come to think of it, after voicing my fear, I immediately had a sense of relief.  That seems to be true for most things in life, I suppose.  We often make ourselves so uncomfortable trying to cover up what we’re afraid of, or ignoring it all together, that it grows into a larger, scarier beast (perhaps simply to get our attention).  If I were to distill my fear, it really came down to the embarrassment of fainting or throwing up.  By sharing my fear with Raul, he was empowered to help me and make some adjustments so that didn’t happen.  So, if you have any fear or anxiety about having your blood drawn, be sure to share that information with the nurse or Phlebotomist, they’re actually extremely accommodating.  After, you might notice that the only drawn out thing about a blood draw is you driving yourself crazy thinking about it.  Similar to the rules that apply to those who have a difficult mother-in-law – acknowledge the fear, but you don’t have to invite it out to lunch and entertain it.

-Diana, former BHED donor