egg donor


Growing

Monday, February 15th, 2010

iStock_000004609436XSmall

Check out our freshly updated “Who We Are” page to meet the newest staff members to join the BHED team.  Liz Bader-Natal, Bay Area Coordinator,  provides support to Donors and Intended Parents throughout the duration of the cycle.  Sally Blackford manages our online server and has lent a tremendous hand in keeping day-to-day administrative work running smoothly.  And Diana Ashley, a previous donor herself, works in Donor Outreach to keep each of our donor’s profiles accurate and up-to-date.

With the increases that we’ve seen in every area – from donor applicants to interview, to cycles to manage and medical records to request (and fax, and file, and update…), these ladies have jumped in with both feet and done a stellar job helping our program grow with grace.

Newest BHED Babies!

Tuesday, February 2nd, 2010

These two GORGEOUS little girls were born, via a gestational surrogate, to clients Dave and John.

david

Congratulations, guys!!!

The Not-So Drawn Out Blood Draw

Wednesday, January 20th, 2010

The post below comes to us from Diana, a two-time previous donor who is also a staff member at Beverly Hills Egg Donation.  To read her first entry, dealing with overcoming her anxiety about self-injections, click here.

iStock_000002253915SmallNow, let’s get on to the business of having blood drawn during your cycle.  Sure, I recently discovered it’s a piece of cake to have a needle in my skin for a second during an injection, but what about a needle being nestled into my vein for more than a minute as my precious life force is drained from my body into a cold heartless vial?  This would be tricky.  For those of you who hate having blood drawn, you are not alone.  I was the girl who broke into a cold sweat, literally soaking my shirt the minute I sat in the strange school-desk chair, oddly appropriate as I would often be having an internal fit reminiscent of a 2nd grader, and was handed that ball to squeeze.  I hadn’t had blood taken in so long (and hardly remember the last go around after having fainted).  They call my name.  I walk over to what is referred to as the (ahem, cough, swallow) “Blood Station” with my iPod earphones in.

My deer in the headlights look is greeted by the kindest pair of eyes I’ve ever seen.  These eyes belong to Raul, the Phlebotomist.  He seems to notice my unease, perhaps my clenched fists and general lack of breathing or blinking, and says “I take it you’re not a fan of having your blood drawn?”  To which I say “Not a fan at all, maybe even a heckler” as a strange trail of nervous giggles leaks out of my clenched jaw.  I try to make jokes when I’m nervous, also to downplay how incredibly frightened I am, they’re also usually really horrible jokes as demonstrated.  But for some reason, Raul’s warm presence had me feel it was okay to just come clean, “I’m actually terrified of having my blood drawn.  In fact, it’s the only thing I’m afraid of.  Some people fear car accidents, life failure, earthquakes.  I fear sitting in that chair.  I usually pass out or vomit either before, during or after having my blood drawn.  In fact, I’ve avoided doing it for several years because I’m always so embarrassed by my fainting or throwing up.”  Wow, thanks for the biopic, Barbara Walters.  Raul is not at all put off by this, in fact, he appears to find this honesty refreshingly charming (this is what I tell myself after feeling like I just shared some sort of Judy Blume confessional diary entry).  He’s not looking at me like the high-maintenance mess that’s about to make his job a huge pain.  He puts his hand on my shoulder and says, “I’m really good, you won’t feel a thing.  Let’s have you lie down.”  I lay down and already feel 100 times better than I usually did in the chair.  I say, “Raul, I’m going to turn my music up really loud while you do this.”  He smiles and says, “No problem, do what you have to do.”  I turn on my music and the next thing I know Raul is telling me it’s over.  I couldn’t believe it.  I sat up and almost cried.  ”You’re the best Raul!  The best!  You’re the fastest blood-taker in the west!  You’re a blood-taking ninja!”  Raul was laughing, I was laughing.  It was a regular feel good Who’s the Boss episode where Raul lovingly pats me on the head and calls me “Saman-ta”.

Stock PhotoSo what made this go-around so different than previous blood draws?  Quite simply, being open and honest with the Phlebotomist about my fear.  For so long I had tried to”hide” it, as I was painfully embarrassed that a woman my age couldn’t handle what, in the grand scheme of things, is such a simple thing to do.  Come to think of it, after voicing my fear, I immediately had a sense of relief.  That seems to be true for most things in life, I suppose.  We often make ourselves so uncomfortable trying to cover up what we’re afraid of, or ignoring it all together, that it grows into a larger, scarier beast (perhaps simply to get our attention).  If I were to distill my fear, it really came down to the embarrassment of fainting or throwing up.  By sharing my fear with Raul, he was empowered to help me and make some adjustments so that didn’t happen.  So, if you have any fear or anxiety about having your blood drawn, be sure to share that information with the nurse or Phlebotomist, they’re actually extremely accommodating.  After, you might notice that the only drawn out thing about a blood draw is you driving yourself crazy thinking about it.  Similar to the rules that apply to those who have a difficult mother-in-law – acknowledge the fear, but you don’t have to invite it out to lunch and entertain it.

-Diana, BHED donor #4829

Face-to-Face Interviews, 3,000 Miles Away

Thursday, January 14th, 2010

BusinesswomanFor our applicants who live outside of the Los Angeles area, we conduct our interviews via webcam, which gives us the exceptional ability to say that we’ve actually met each one of the egg donors on our database!  I’ve worked with other agencies in the past and I can’t say that the same is true for those organizations.  This gives us the confirmation that the person on the other end really is who they say they are, and gives us a much better feel for the donor’s personality and character.  I really enjoy being able to communicate with a donor in this way.  Some donors who have children of their own will even bring their child(ren) to the camera for a few minutes.  I also love seeing a donor who takes copious notes during our interview – when I can see her writing, it’s confirmation to me that she wants to make sure she knows what is required of her.

More and more of our applicants now have their own cameras that they are able to use for the interview, and for donors who don’t we will send one out via UPS.  From a logistics standpoint, this system actually runs surprisingly smoothly.  The only challenge I’ve experienced when working with webcams is that some donors who have never used a webcam before might have some trouble setting it up, but that is usually sorted out quickly and we can start the interview.  When the interview is over the donor just sends the camera back to us to be used by another candidate.  The process of sending the camera back is very simple as well – we provide them with a return label so there is no expense to the donor.  It makes it easy for everyone!

-Susan Rai, Beverly Hills Egg Donation

The Call to Start a Family

Sunday, January 10th, 2010

AllieI stumbled upon the idea of egg donation a couple of years ago when a friend was looking at job postings on Craigslist.  While neither of us considered the idea too seriously at the time; it stuck with me, not as a money making idea, but as an awesome thing to do for a woman or a family.  I looked at a few donation websites recently and when I found BHED, I knew this was something I wanted to do.  I immediately felt comfortable with their website and staff, and started to get really excited about the possibility of my little eggs creating a life for someone else.

As I grow older, I can feel an inner tugging towards wanting a family.  My mom always used to tell me the story of how she decided to have my older brother and me.  She had lunch with an old friend who had a newborn baby and thought, “It’s time.  I want that.”  When I was young, I thought I never wanted kids and my mom’s story sounded so cliche to me.  I’m not ready to have kids now, but I’m finally beginning to understand how my mom felt.  To have a baby inside you is such a gift.  I want to help make that happen for someone.

-Allie, donor #7265

How to Needle Your Way Out of Injection Anxiety

Thursday, October 22nd, 2009

I’d like to dedicate this entry to my needle fearing friends.  You know who you are.  The gal that hears the word “needle” one moment and finds herself hanging upside down from the ceiling fan the next.  The thought of having blood taken for some is a minor inconvenience, but, for you, it’s a nightmare equal to that of having a spider crawl in your ear and hang a finely crocheted web on your cochlea.  The smell of rubbing alcohol at a doctor’s office triggers a sort of Pavlov’s Dog response to pull down your shirt sleeves and put your veins on lock down.  I know who you are because, a few months ago, I was you.

istock_000003069134small4I’ll be honest, when I decided to donate I was so excited about the idea of helping someone have a child that I had sort of “overlooked” the logistics of injections and having weekly blood draws.  This honeymoon phase vanished the moment I received my box of medication, which included about 30 needles.  I quickly ran over to my roommate and showed her in horror.  She shrugged and said, “They’re tiny”.  Yeah, okay, tough guy, they’re tiny.  But, lest us not forget, they’re still NEEDLES.  A tiny cockroach is still a cockroach.  Besides, it’s all relative.  Your tiny is my huge.  Your “it’s just a needle” is my nightmare on ice with a sprig of nausea.

Fast forward to my first injection.  The staff at my doctor’s office thoroughly explained the process of how to do a self-administered injection, so I did feel a little more at ease – empowered with knowledge as they say.  **Side note: the staff at the office I went through were simply amazing.  Take the opportunity to get to know the staff at whatever office you go through.  They are an invaluable asset to the entire process, like your medically trained cheerleaders.  Back to my first date with the needle: I got home and paced around like an anxious cat who kept hearing its name being called.  I looked at the clock, it was ten minutes until I was scheduled to do my injection.  I laid out my supplies – the alcohol pad, the needle, the vile of Lupron and (what I will reveal to you as the holy grail of injections, ladies) my slightly frozen can of diet coke.  Who would have thought a diet coke could contain such power that, if wielded correctly, could erase a lifetime of fear.  I suppose it did skyrocket Cindy Crawford’s career and make us all go cut our jeans into shorts.  So here’s the deal: throw a can of soda in the freezer for a bit and let it get nice and cold.  Five minutes before your scheduled injection, numb the area.  My nurse suggested numbing it for a minute, but for this first go-around I decided to put every last sensation in my skin to sleep…five minutes for me, thanks.  I numbed the area, went over it with an alcohol pad, let it dry, and drew up my dose in a syringe.  In that moment, I had an epiphany – if Katherine Heigl’s character on Grey’s Anatomy can do it, I can do it.  I pinched the skin on my tummy, lined up the needle, took a breath, istock_000007383548xsmall7looked away and put it in (at a 90 degree angle).  When I looked back down, the needle was in but I was completely shocked, I couldn’t feel anything.  Nothing.  Zip.  I want to be clear here and say, I am a wus about this stuff and I honestly couldn’t even feel it.  I released the tummy pinch, pushed the dose in, removed the needle (pull straight out), wiped over the area with alcohol and did a victory phone lap, calling about ten of my closest friends to tell them that I was a fearless Goddess Warrior who may have missed her calling as a professional shot giver.  As strange as it sounds, I was actually looking forward to my next injection.

I think that my greatest piece of advice in regards to how to cope with injection anxiety would be to remember that we’re often our own worst enemies – psyching ourselves out, telling ourselves “I can’t do this”.  I’m here to tell you that if I can, you most certainly can.  Think of some of the stuff you’ve overcome in your life.  In comparison, I’m sure that needle truly is tiny.

-Diana, BHED donor #4829

Embryo Transfer after Egg Donation: Is Two Better than One?

Monday, October 12th, 2009

During the early years of IVF treatment, it was always assumed that transferring more embryos would improve success rates.  Even 20 years ago, it quickly became apparent that this success came at the expense of a high multiple birth rate.  In response o this, many European countries and Australia limited the number of embryos that could be legally transferred to woman’s uterus.  While laudable, these restrictions tend to be rigid and do not always take into account the age of the producer.

In the U.S., we have adopted a voluntary system through the American Society of Reproductive Medicine (ASRM).  The ASRM has published guidelines that take into account maternal age and are more flexible.  However, as seen in the recent case of the famous octuplets, there are no serious consequences when a poor outcome is attributed to not adhering to these guidelines.

While these measures have greatly reduced the incidence of triplets and higher-order multiple births, the incidence of twins remains high, especially with egg donation.  Many patients may think this is fine.  In fact, many couples express a desire to have twins.  Their preferences are affected by a belief that transferring two or three embryos improves success rates, and, for some, a financial motive that sees twins as a “two-for-the-price of one.”

The success rate belief may be inaccurate.  Many European studies, as well as our experience, strongly suggest that the success rates with two day-3 embryos is equal to the success rate with one good quality (day-5) blastocyst.  The ASRM guidelines allow either choice.  Yet, many clinics are still transferring two blastocysts, with predictably high twin rates.  So, what’s wrong with that?

The problem with twins is that they have a 50% chance of being born prematurely.  As a result, they have higher rates of cerebral palsy and other complications of prematurity.  The combined medical costs from IVF twins due to ICU care and life-long complications from prematurity are easily in the billions of dollars.  Furthermore, from conception to delivery, there is a reduced chance of actually delivering two live babies.   Even when twins are born close to term and are healthy, there are considerable financial and emotional costs associated with them.

With appropriate statistical analysis, it may be possible to demonstrate that the chance of a live birth is the same after the transfer of one blastocyst compared to the transfer of two embryos.

While twins may seem cute and a bargain at first, patients undergoing egg donation should inform themselves of the risks of twins and discuss the potential merits of single embryo transfer (SET) with their physician.

- Michael Feinman, MD

Medical Director, HRC Fertility

Huntington Reproductive Center Medical Group

feinmanivf@havingbabies.com

I’m Jewish. Do I Need a Jewish Egg Donor?

Friday, October 2nd, 2009

When choosing an egg donor, it is understandable that women will want to select a donor who is similar to themselves in appearance and ethnic background.  As with many aspects of Jewish Law, what may seem obvious and desirable may not conform to rabbinical interpretations of the Law.  Ironically, since it is sometimes difficult to find suitable Jewish donors, these legal twists can actually help some people “let go” of their desire to work only with Jewish donors.

There are three concerns that rabbis have addressed in their discussions regarding the selection of egg donors.  The first is accidental incest.  The second is the legal status of a woman’s eggs.  The third, and possibly the most important to recipients, is the Jewish status of the children born through egg donation.

jewish7

Reasonable concerns exist that due to the anonymity of most egg donation arrangements, the actual children of the donor could accidentally marry the offspring of the woman who received her eggs.  Sounds far-fetched, but rabbis worry about such things.

As to the status of the eggs, rabbis have agreed that according to Jewish Law, a husband has a legal attachment to his wife’s eggs.  In theory, according to Jewish Law, the resulting offspring could have a claim on the donor’s husband in a Jewish court of law.

While Reform Judaism recognizes that parentage can come from either parent, traditionally most, but not all, rabbis have agreed that if a Jewish woman gives birth to the baby, that child is fully Jewish.  The Laws determining a child’s family and religion of origin were established thousands of years ago – long before genetic testing – and so Jewishness is passed from the mother who gives birth rather than from the genetic parents.

Based on these three considerations, the following principles can guide most Jewish couples considering egg donation:

A Jewish donor is not legally required for a Jewish couple.  Based on the concerns about accidental incest and the legal status of eggs, a non-Jewish donor may actually be preferable.  Accepting this idea can alleviate much of the angst over trying to find a Jewish donor which can be difficult.

If a Jewish woman is chosen, she should be single or married to a non-Jewish man.  If she is divorced, she needs a Jewish divorce, including a “Get.”

The process of choosing an egg donor is different for every family.  There are an endless number of things to consider in making such an important decision.  If observing Jewish Law is a priority for the Intended Parent(s), then finding a Jewish donor is not only unnecessary, but potentially undesirable.  Ideally, this will be helpful to some as the pool of potential donors will be enlarged significantly.

- Michael Feinman, MD

Medical Director, HRC Fertility

Huntington Reproductive Center Medical Group

feinmanivf@havingbabies.com

Egg Donation and Tattoos

Monday, September 28th, 2009

If you’re registered as an egg donor, getting a new tattoo becomes a decision that can have a much bigger affect than you’d ever anticipated.  For a potential recipient who has spent weeks pouring over donor profiles (and sometimes thousands of dollars on previous failed IVF cycles), only to fall in love with their perfect match, news that their ideal donor has gotten a tattoo from an unlicensed facility can be devastating.

tattooAll of this can be avoided if you keep in mind that potential donors cannot donate their eggs if they’ve had a tattoo or body piercing within the past six months to a year – typically six months for a piercing and one year for a tattoo.  The only exception to this rule is if you can provide written and signed proof that your tattoo or piercing was administered at a state-regulated facility, using a sterile technique.  Even then, however, some doctors will still require that donors wait eight weeks before donating – one clinic still requires donors to wait the full 12 months!  To make things even more complicated, the official regulations vary from state to state, and only 32 states even have such regulations.  If you choose to have your tattoo or piercing administered in a state that does not enforce regulations, you can be sure that you’ll be in for an extremely long wait before you’re finally able to donate.

If you’re serious about wanting to donate and help a family in need, Beverly Hills Egg Donation recommends that you hold off on any plans for a new tattoo or piercing until after you’ve completed your donation cycle(s).

The Key to Becoming an AWESOME Egg Donor?…It’s All in the Organization

Friday, September 25th, 2009

You know when you get something new…you go home and hang it up/lay it out/try it on/unpack it/reorganize it, and it just makes you all happy and fulfilled?  Like, when you  go to Target and come home with $300 worth of things you don’t need (but might need one day way, way in the future) and you put them all in your cabinets and bathroom and kitchen like back stock in a stockroom, and there’s this strange overwhelming sense of pride and satisfaction that only you can appreciate?  Because, it’s not like you bought new shoes – it’s toilet paper and Ziploc sandwich bags.

The start of a cycle is like that for me, but taken to a new level…because my stockroom has things that no one else I know will ever have.  I have drugs in vials that need to be mixed.  I have syringes and needles.  I have a biohazard receptacle!  And when I get home from work and the Fed Ex box with the cooler of medication is sitting on my stoop, my blood pressure rises and my heart races…project!  I always arrange my supplies in my kitchen before a cycle, including wrapping the ugly burgundy biohazard container up in  paper (I mean, who has a burgundy color scheme?).

img_2178

I think it’s safe for me to admit that I am afflicted with situational OCD, and it manifests at times like this.  I embrace it.  And, OCD or not, I think you’ll find that setting up your supplies as if they were ingredients for a chocolate chip cookie recipe makes the fact that you are about to inject a needle into your stomach just a little easier to digest.

-Kate, BHED Donor