egg donor process


Waiting to Get Matched

Friday, April 8th, 2011

“How long will it take for me to get matched?”  This is one of the MOST common questions BHED gets from donors.  The truth is, there’s really just no way to predict how quickly you’ll be matched.  We’ve seen donors matched within hours, and some are on our database for 2-3 months (up to a year or more) before they start a cycle.  Understandably, the biggest factor in how quickly a donor gets picked is her resemblance to the intended mother.  BHED has many recipients looking for their “perfect match” at any given time, and chances are good that a donor will get chosen much sooner if she happens to look physically similar to one of them.  That said, some recipients care more about an impressive educational record, or a donor with common interests, than physical similarity, and still others only want to work with donors who have donated before, have children of their own, or have a particular blood type.  Finding the right donor is such a personal (and big) decision, and every recipient goes about it in his or her own way.

Even though physical resemblance is completely out of the donor’s control, there are a number of things you can do to help increase your chances of getting matched more quickly…

1. Make sure your profile is filled out completely, and is kept up-to-date.  Our staff will contact you every few months to go over your information and make sure it’s still accurate, but be sure to send along updates as they come along.  Also, if you recently added volunteer work to your resume, graduated from school, ran in a triathlon, or increased your GPA – let us know about it!

2. Pictures, pictures, pictures.  Upload great photos to your gallery (casual, friendly shots taken in natural light that look like YOU!).  Besides current photos, we need pictures of you growing up (at various stages in life – baby through adult), pictures of your immediate family members, and (most importantly) a nice, clear headshot, which is the first thing recipients see when your profile comes up.  Making sure your photo gallery is in good shape is one of the biggest things you can do to help yourself get matched.  BHED holds photoshoots every 6-8 weeks where donors can get (free!) professional photographs taken for their profiles.  You can contact Alexa Abrams, our donor coordinator, at alexa@bhed.com for details.

3. Return calls and emails from our office promptly.  When a recipient narrows their list down to one or two favorite donors, they generally have additional questions, want to confirm dates and/or request to see more pictures.  If you see a phone call or message from our office, make sure to get back to us as quickly as you can.  We can’t match you if we can’t get in touch with you, and most recipients want to be sure their favorite donor is communicative and responsible before moving forward.

Again, how quickly a donor gets matched is often completely out of her control, BUT, in our experience, donors who keep the above tips in mind are far more successful in finding a match.  Our donor team is always happy to review your profile with you and suggest changes to better showcase yourself.  Be patient, be communicative, and know that sometimes getting chosen by a recipient is just a matter of time.  We look forward to seeing you matched!

L’s Story: Part One

Friday, January 16th, 2009

Newborn Baby

If you’re thinking about or trying to use an egg donor, you’ve probably already been through a lot.  I am 34 years old and I was told about a year and a half ago that I suffer from a diminished ovarian reserve and it was very unlikely that I would be able to give birth to my own child.

While I knew there was something wrong very early on, I never expected to hear that it was very unlikely and that it probably wouldn’t happen.  My FSH was only borderline in the beginning so we decided to hurry up and try an IVF cycle first.  We got 6 eggs (a miracle we thought), 5 fertilized, 4 survived the first 2 days and 3 were viable for implantation.  They weren’t a very high grade and they didn’t have the best cell count but all 3 were implanted anyway, there’s always a chance.  Well, I couldn’t help but be elated to find out on the first attempt that I was pregnant according to the first blood test.  Within a week though, my levels dropped, instead of doubling every day, and I was told that I had a chemical pregnancy but it wasn’t viable.  My eggs just weren’t strong enough, healthy enough.  Encouraged by the fact that I thought they were wrong and I DID have eggs, I wanted to try again.  We tried a different protocol the second cycle and I ended up getting canceled this time before retrieval.  We finally gave in and decided to go the donor route.  We’d like to have more than one child and recognizing this could take a long time, felt we should get moving on to the egg donor process.


We’ve now worked with two egg clinics in two different states, 3 different agencies and I’ve lost track of how many donors, probably a dozen.  I’m sure there are recipient couples who’ve matched quickly and had a successful transfer on the first attempt, however, that was just not our luck.  We, unfortunately, suffered a very miserable experience with a terrible agency in FL that really highlighted the importance of a good agency.  At first, I didn’t care which agency we selected because I was so picky about which donors were an option for us.  It will save you a lot of time if you are selective about both.

-L, Recipient

Editor’s Note: L’s story will be continued in part two of this installment.  If you’d like to share your story on our blog, please contact Katie at katie@bhed.com