Beverly Hills Egg Donation
Thursday, July 7th, 2011
All intended parents are confronted with the decision as to whether or not they should tell their child (and others) that they used a third-party to conceive their child. Parents usually come to a decision based on their own comfort level and feelings regarding using an egg donor or surrogate. Most experts agree that honesty is the best policy when it comes to informing your child. A good website that goes into more detail about how to talk to your children in developmentally appropriate ways is www.donor-conception-network.org. The website has a great series of booklets entitled “Telling and Talking” – they offer advice on how to talk to your child at every stage. Before telling your child you want to asses 1) the child’s emotional and intellectual capacity to process the information and 2) the extent to which your family, culture or religion may be able to accept a child born through egg donation or surrogacy.
The decision to tell your child may be an easy one or one fraught with decision. Most family therapists would agree that telling your child is the easier path to take because there’s no room for misconceptions or false information, which inevitably leads to feelings of betrayal or mistrust. It’s also recommended to start giving some information at a relatively early age, from three to five years old. Again, the website above goes into thorough detail in advising how to talk to children of all ages regarding their conception.
- Brenda Fahn-Hardt M.S., MFT
Beverly Hills Egg Donation Staff Psychotherapist
Tags: assisted roproduction, Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donation agency, egg donor, egg donors, IVF, Southern California assisted reproduction
Posted in Advice From Our Colleagues | No Comments »
Tuesday, June 21st, 2011
From our companion site, Ask Kate:
 Q: I’m going through the donation process, and have found that it’s so hard to find information out there about it. How long is the typical cycle from the beginning of the hormone shots until retrieval?
A: The length of a cycle can vary. I know that’s SUCH an annoying answer, especially when you’re skimming FAQ pages looking for a concrete number. It depends on where you begin your timeline – if you start with birth control, the cycle can be 5 weeks long (a couple weeks on BC to regulate your cycle and sync it up with the recipient and a few weeks on stim meds). So much is determined by the recipient, and where she’s at in her cycle. If your recipient is ready to go, you could be on BC less than two weeks and starting the injections within 10 days.
On the other hand, if your timeline starts with the stim medication, then the process could be as short as 14 days or as long as four weeks. I’ve done both versions. The short cycle is great, because it’s over so fast that you don’t have a whole lot of life interruption and the doctor’s appointments are daily, fast and routine — like a train through a station. That said, I was able to do a short cycle because I had good starting hormone levels and my recipient was alike in that way, so we were able to barrel through together.
When I was asked to do a third cycle, my doctors changed. I was at USC’s IVF facility and, as any scholastic approach to medicine goes, the longer it takes, the more we learn. I was annoyed at first, because I had gotten used to minimal interruption to my work, diet and physical life, but a couple of weeks into it — when I’d normally be wrapping things up — I realized how much better I like the “long cycle.” Since it was slower and more drawn out, the effects to my body were far more gradual, and my recovery was easier. I was more comfortable with the changes to my ovaries (it’s a pretty big physical change that is hard to imagine until you experience it) because what used to happen in a matter of 7 days was happening over the course of three weeks instead.
Your cycle would not take longer than 4 weeks, but it may take up to that long, for sure. By the end, you’ll feel fatigued and your retrieval will be welcome when it rolls around. But, be okay with the discomfort – it’s not forever, and the result is priceless.
- Kate Lee, 6-time BHED Donor
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donor, egg donor injections, egg donor shots, egg donors, how long does egg donation take, IVF
Posted in From Donor's Perspective | No Comments »
Tuesday, June 14th, 2011
 I’d like to dedicate this entry to my needle fearing friends. You know who you are. The gal that hears the word “needle” one moment and finds herself hanging upside down from the ceiling fan the next. The thought of having blood taken is a minor inconvenience for some, but, for you, it’s a nightmare equal to that of having a spider crawl in your ear and hang a finely crocheted web on your cochlea. The smell of rubbing alcohol at a doctor’s office triggers a sort of Pavlov’s Dog response to pull down your shirt sleeves and put your veins on lock down. I know who you are because, a few months ago, I was you.
I’ll be honest, when I decided to donate I was so excited about the idea of helping someone have a child that I had sort of “overlooked” the logistics of injections and having weekly blood draws. This honeymoon phase vanished the moment I received my box of medication, which included about 30 needles. I quickly ran over to my roommate and showed her in horror. She shrugged and said, “They’re tiny”.  Yeah, okay, tough guy, they’re tiny. But, let us not forget, they’re still NEEDLES. A tiny cockroach is still a cockroach. Besides, it’s all relative. Your tiny is my huge. Your “it’s just a needle” is my nightmare on ice with a sprig of nausea.
Fast forward to my first injection. The staff at my doctor’s office thoroughly explained the process of how to do a self-administered injection, so I did feel a little more at ease — empowered with knowledge as they say. **Side note: the staff at the office I went through were simply amazing. Take the opportunity to get to know the staff at whatever office you go through. They are an invaluable asset to the entire process, like your medically trained cheerleaders. Back to my first date with the needle: I got home and paced around like an anxious cat who kept hearing its name being called. I looked at the clock, it was ten minutes until I was scheduled to do my injection. I laid out my supplies — the alcohol pad, the needle, the vile of Lupron and  (what I will reveal to you as the holy grain of injections, ladies) my slightly frozen can of diet coke. Who would have thought a diet coke could contain such power that, if wielded correctly, could erase a lifetime of fear. I suppose it did skyrocket Cindy Crawford’s career and make us all go cut our jeans into shorts. So here’s the deal: throw a can of soda in the freezer for a bit and let it get nice and cold. Five minutes before your scheduled injection, numb the area. My nurse suggested numbing it for a minute, but for this first go-around I decided to put every sensation in my skin to sleep… five minutes for me, thanks. I numbed the area, went over it with an alcohol pad, let it dry, and drew up my dose in a syringe. In that moment, I had an epiphany — if Katherine Heigl’s character on Grey’s Anatomy can do it, I can do it. I pinched the skin on my tummy, lined up the needle, took a breath, looked away and put it in (at a 90 degree angle). When I looked back down, the needle was in but I was completely shocked, I couldn’t feel anything. Nothing. Zip. I want to be clear here and say, I am a wus about this stuff and I honestly couldn’t even feel it. I released the tummy pinch, pushed the dose in, removed the needle (pull straight out), wiped over the area with alcohol and did a victory lap, calling about ten of my closest friends to tell them that I was a fearless Goddess Warrior who may have missed her calling as a professional shot giver. As strange as it sounds, I was actually looking forward to my next injection.
I think that my greatest piece of advice in regards to how to cope with injection anxiety would be to remember that we’re often our own worst enemies — psyching ourselves out, telling ourselves “I can’t do this”. I’m here to tell you that if I can, you most certainly can. Think of some of the stuff you’ve overcome in your life. In comparison, I’m sure that needle truly is tiny.
- Evan Ashley, BHED staff member and former donor
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donor, egg donor agency, egg donor injections, egg donor medical process
Posted in From Donor's Perspective | No Comments »
Wednesday, June 8th, 2011
 Often, egg donors inquire about egg donation and expect that they will be donating just one of their eggs to an infertile couple. It just doesn’t work that way. When an egg donor is matched with a recipient, they are contracted to donate the eggs that they produce in a particular menstrual cycle. During that cycle, the physician that the donor is seeing intentionally increases the number of eggs that are produced. While a “normal” cycle might result in one or two eggs released in a month, those numbers would be cause to cancel an egg donor cycle prior to retrieval.
The number of eggs produced and donated in an egg donor cycle can range from about 8 to as many as 40 (although that is very, very rare). The average cycle results in a retrieval of between 12 and 20 eggs. The eggs are fertilized after retrieval, and often not all of them will successfully develop into embryos. About 12 to 14 healthy embryos generally result from 20 eggs. Some of these embryos (possibly 2) will be transferred to the recipient or a gestational carrier, and the remainder are frozen for future use.
We always encourage any questions a prospective donor might have. Please refer to our main site for more information about becoming a donor and feel free to contact us directly at any time.
- Ellie Goldman, BHED Cycle Coordinator
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donation information, egg donor, egg donor question
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Monday, June 6th, 2011
 One of the questions Intended Parents often ask is “Can you recommend a good doctor?”. Other variations include “Should I stay with my current doctor?”, “Should I move to a doctor closer to where the egg donor lives?”, and sometimes “I’m not sure if I should move doctors or not – what do you think?”
Here are the answers to those questions, in our opinion…
1) “Can you recommend a good doctor?” Yes, we can provide recommendations for you.
We have been fortunate enough to work with many of the top Reproductive Endocrinologists (“fertility doctors”) in the country, and from those experiences (and client feedback) we have a good sense of who most of the better doctors are. We base our recommendations on a number of factors, including:
- General reputation and feedback from past patients
- Quality and professionalism of the office staff (front office, nursing, etc.)
- General compliance with current “industry standards”, including information such as number of embryos typically implanted, compliance with common testing, administration of medication, etc. (Note that since we are not physicians, we cannot comment, and would not deign to comment, on any particular doctor’s medical protocol. However, when we see a lower success rate and highly unusual protocol used, we get concerned…)
- General office “vibe” (for example, many clinics with in-house egg donor programs are very negative towards working with agencies)
- Specific success rates (sometimes per SART, sometimes per our own information or in-house statistics)
Note that we do not limit our work to any particular group or clinic, but as we gather first-hand information, we will use it to help our clients make the best choice for them.
2) “Should I stay with my current doctor?” “Should I move to a doctor closer to where the donor lives?” That all depends…
We believe that the most important criteria in choosing or keeping your physician include:
- Your comfort level with and trust in your doctor. If you love your doctor and totally trust him or her, as long as they are supportive of using an egg donor from an agency, definitely keep that doctor. We think that if you are calm during the process, and are willing to do what your doctor says because you trust in that doctor, you are more likely to have a successful cycle. This is only said from anecdotal evidence and other’s opinions, but being in a good place psychologically as you’re on buckets of hormones (and going through a somewhat surreal process) can’t help but benefit you.
 If finances are an issue (as they generally are) and you choose an egg donor from another city, you might want to consider moving to a doctor in that city. However, if you love your current doctor, the difference in dollars is probably irrelevant — certainly in the long term. If you do choose to use or keep a doctor in a city far from where the donor lives, make sure that you’re aware of the outside monitoring costs as early in the process as possible. (The finance person at the doctor’s office, along with our cycle coordinator, can help you with that.) The less surprises that happen in this process, the better.
All of BHED’s clients are assigned a cycle coordinator — a senior member of our staff who follows your case through from the time you choose your donor until retrieval (and often, beyond.) The Cycle Coordinators will be in regular contact with your doctor’s office from the time you sign your contract with us, and she will alert you if we have any unexpected challenges with the doctor’s office. Most of the time things work out just fine.
Note that we stay with you until you become pregnant or decide to discontinue trying. Your choice of doctor is certainly an important part of this process, and is one of the keys to the success of your pursuit to begin or build your family.
We look forward to helping you realize your dream through egg donation!
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donor, egg donor agency, egg donors, fertility doctor, fertility doctors, Reproductive Endocrinologists
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Friday, June 3rd, 2011
 The post-retrieval recovery is very manageable. Truly. If you’re active and healthy, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to bounce right back. It’s important to take about a week to recover – take it easy, drink lots of Gatorade and Vitamin Water, and follow your doctor’s instructions. Allow your body to heal. Everything inside of you has just gone through the ringer, and you’ll feel tender, sore, and bloated in the days following the retrieval (not unlike what you’d experience with a heavy period). You can expect to get your first post-cycle period about 10 days after your procedure (10-12 days after your HCG shot) and once that’s come and gone, you’ll feel a million times better.  If you wish to donate again, you’ll need to have two normal periods before you’re cleared to go for another cycle. Any weight gain can be chalked up to fluids, so be sure to drink enough electrolytes (the swelling and retention usually go down quickly).
Every doctor is different, and your clinic will have specific instructions for your recovery (you’ll also get more information regarding when you can get back to your “normal routine” – including working out, having sex, etc.), but the most important advice for a smooth recovery is to let the body do its thing, drink plenty of fluids, and be good to yourself. You’ll be smooth sailing in no time.
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donation recovery, egg donor, egg donors
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Wednesday, June 1st, 2011
When choosing an egg donor, it is understandable that women will want to select a donor who is similar to themselves in appearance and ethnic background. As with many aspects of Jewish Law, what may seem obvious and desirable may not conform to rabbinical interpretations of the Law. Ironically, since it is sometimes difficult to find suitable Jewish donors, these legal twists can actually help some people “let go” of their desire to work only with Jewish donors.
While Reform Judaism recognizes that parentage can come from either parent, traditionally most, but not all, rabbis have agreed that if a Jewish woman gives birth to the baby, that child is fully Jewish. The Laws determining a child’s family and religion of origin were established thousands of years ago — long before genetic testing — and so Jewishness is passed from the mother who gives birth rather than from the genetic parents.
The following principles can guide most Jewish couples considering egg donation:
A Jewish donor is not legally required for a Jewish couple. Based on the concerns about accidental incest and the legal status of eggs, a non-Jewish donor may actually be preferable. Accepting this idea can alleviate much of the angst over trying to find a Jewish donor (which, again, can be difficult).
If a Jewish donor is chosen, she should be single or married to a non-Jewish man. If she is divorced, she needs a Jewish divorce, including a “Get.”
The process of choosing an egg donor is different for every family. There are an endless number of things to consider in making such an important decision. If observing Jewish Law is a priority for the Intended Parent(s), then finding a Jewish donor is not as necessary as one might think. Ideally, this will be helpful to some (as the pool of potential donors will be enlarged significantly).
- Michael Feinman, MD
Medical Director, HRC Fertility
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, do I need a Jewish egg donor, egg donation, egg donor, Jewish egg donation, Jewish egg donor
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Tuesday, May 24th, 2011
From our companion site, Ask Kate:
Q: I am currently researching whether I want to start donating my eggs, and I have a concern: I have a full time job that doesn’t offer a whole lot of paid time off. Looking at the egg donor information section, I see that there are many AM doctor’s appointments. How often are they? Daily? Weekly? Is there ever an option for late afternoon appointments? I really want to do this, but I don’t see it working if morning appointments are all that are available. Can you advise?
 A: It’ll be tough if your job is inflexible. However, you chances of success are extraordinary if you sit down with your HR department or boss and explain to them that you need some leeway for upcoming doctor’s appointments. There’s no harm in laying it out there, and you likely won’t even have to go into specifics. That said, you will need quite a bit of time away from the office. While most clinics do have 7:30am appointments, most doctors don’t arrive until 8:00am and you aren’t seen until 8:30 sometimes. I never got to work before 8:45/9 on any given day of a doctor’s visit. And these appointments have to happen first thing in the morning. There’s no way around it. You need to be monitored early in the day so that your doctor can make any necessary changes to you medication before you do your afternoon injection. Also (and this is more unusual) I was at the doctor every morning during the last week of a few of my cycles because I ran the risk of overstimulating. In that case, the doctors wanted to keep a very close eye on my estrogen levels and ovaries.
Not everyone can make this work, it’s a commitment and you have to make it a top priority. Not doing so could jeopardize the entire cycle. It’s very do-able, just make sure you have a solid game plan going in. Good luck!!
Tags: becoming an egg donor, Beverly Hills Egg Donation, egg donation, egg donation commitment, egg donation procedure, egg donation process, egg donor, egg donors
Posted in From Donor's Perspective | No Comments »
Friday, April 8th, 2011
 “How long will it take for me to get matched?” This is one of the MOST common questions BHED gets from donors. The truth is, there’s really just no way to predict how quickly you’ll be matched. We’ve seen donors matched within hours, and some are on our database for 2-3 months (up to a year or more) before they start a cycle. Understandably, the biggest factor in how quickly a donor gets picked is her resemblance to the intended mother. BHED has many recipients looking for their “perfect match” at any given time, and chances are good that a donor will get chosen much sooner if she happens to look physically similar to one of them. That said, some recipients care more about an impressive educational record, or a donor with common interests, than physical similarity, and still others only want to work with donors who have donated before, have children of their own, or have a particular blood type. Finding the right donor is such a personal (and big) decision, and every recipient goes about it in his or her own way.
Even though physical resemblance is completely out of the donor’s control, there are a number of things you can do to help increase your chances of getting matched more quickly…
1. Make sure your profile is filled out completely, and is kept up-to-date. Our staff will contact you every few months to go over your information and make sure it’s still accurate, but be sure to send along updates as they come along. Also, if you recently added volunteer work to your resume, graduated from school, ran in a triathlon, or increased your GPA – let us know about it!
2. Pictures, pictures, pictures. Upload great photos to your gallery (casual, friendly shots taken in natural light that look like YOU!). Besides current photos, we need pictures of you growing up (at various stages in life – baby through adult), pictures of your immediate family members, and (most importantly) a nice, clear headshot, which is the first thing recipients see when your profile comes up. Making sure your photo gallery is in good shape is one of the biggest things you can do to help yourself get matched. BHED holds photoshoots every 6-8 weeks where donors can get (free!) professional photographs taken for their profiles. You can contact Alexa Abrams, our donor coordinator, at alexa@bhed.com for details.
3. Return calls and emails from our office promptly. When a recipient narrows their list down to one or two favorite donors, they generally have additional questions, want to confirm dates and/or request to see more pictures. If you see a phone call or message from our office, make sure to get back to us as quickly as you can. We can’t match you if we can’t get in touch with you, and most recipients want to be sure their favorite donor is communicative and responsible before moving forward.
Again, how quickly a donor gets matched is often completely out of her control, BUT, in our experience, donors who keep the above tips in mind are far more successful in finding a match. Our donor team is always happy to review your profile with you and suggest changes to better showcase yourself. Be patient, be communicative, and know that sometimes getting chosen by a recipient is just a matter of time. We look forward to seeing you matched!
Tags: Beverly Hills Egg Donation, BHED, egg donation, egg donation southern california, egg donor, egg donor process
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