I was thirty-seven when I finally realized I was ready to be a mom. I felt happy, secure in my job, well-traveled and healthier than I had been in years. When I informed my doctor of my plan, he immediately ran a battery of routine tests, but felt confident that all would be perfect. There were no visible signs, or symptoms, that I would have any trouble conceiving.
About one week later, I got a call from my doctor. He explained calmly that having a baby the traditional way was not going to be possible for me. My FSH was 48 and my eggs were no longer viable. He immediately introduced the egg donation process to me. He was unbelievably kind, patient and understanding. He answered all of my questions and then some.
I needed time to digest what he had said. While I was grateful that I lived in an age where modern technology would allow me to have the experience of carrying a baby, I still needed a bit of time to mourn the loss of not having a child genetically related to me. I had always placed so much importance on being able to recognize a piece of myself (my long fingers, green eyes, thick hair, stubborn will, etc) in my future little boy or girl. This was now gone.
Luckily, I come with an enormous support system of family and friends. They listened to my fears, remorse, etc. until I was finished. It didn’t take me long to realize that my GOAL had not changed. I wanted to be a mom. I needed to be a mom. I was BORN to be a mom!
Immediately I got to work. I scoured the internet for information and began my do diligence. There were so many egg donation agencies to choose from. My mom helped me search through at least twenty of them! My doctor even offered to find a donor for me if I was patient enough to wait at least a year. I’d waited thirty-seven years and couldn’t bear the thought of waiting yet another.
It didn’t take long before I ran into BHED‘s website. I read it thoroughly and it was easy to navigate. It felt classy, professional, safe…right. I called to set up a log in and spoke with Lisa Greer. She was wonderful! I immediately trusted that she knew what she was doing. I was not disappointed when I perused the donors either. They were all beautiful and well-rounded. I felt I couldn’t go wrong. Hence, the trials and the tribulations of the fertility process thus began.
I used two fertility groups. One was near my house on the East Coast. The other was on the West Coast, a doctor that BHED recommended, where my egg donor was located. The embryo was implanted on a rare rainy day in Southern California in early February. I am blessed and very excited to say that I am now expecting my first baby (a girl) in October.
Dr. Michael Feinman of HRC deserves many kudos, but the real heroes are Lisa and Ellie Klein from Beverly Hills Egg Donation. Lisa had a hands-on approach that carried me through many a crisis. All of this was accomplished with a calm, personal and professional touch. Lisa is all about getting the job done, while seemingly having an interior made of marshmallow. Ellie, with her kind heart, was a pleasure to work with. She is competent, compassionate, and returned all of my calls and emails (no light compliment in this busy and imperfect world). To put it mildly, I could have NEVER gotten through this process without both their support and guidance.
BHED is the only place to go for the help you need, both emotional and physical. I thank Lisa and Ellie from the bottom of my heart and will always remember their kindness.
Finally, I owe my egg donor a very, very sincere thank you. I will NEVER forget her and will always be grateful for this baby that will be born this fall!
- Melissa, Recipient
All of this can be avoided if you keep in mind that potential donors cannot donate their eggs if they’ve had a tattoo or body piercing within the past six months to a year – typically six months for a piercing and one year for a tattoo. The only exception to this rule is if you can provide written and signed proof that your tattoo or piercing was administered at a state-regulated facility, using a sterile technique. Even then, however, some doctors will still require that donors wait eight weeks before donating – one clinic still requires donors to wait the full 12 months! To make things even more complicated, the official regulations vary from state to state, and only 32 states even have such regulations. If you choose to have your tattoo or piercing administered in a state that does not enforce regulations, you can be sure that you’ll be in for an extremely long wait before you’re finally able to donate.
