Is a psychological consultation really necessary for the intended parents?

July 25th, 2014

Struggling to have a child is stressful enough so the idea of having to include one more person in this process might not be particularly appealing – particularly when it comes to tackling the emotions surrounding what working with an egg donor might mean for you.

However, being given the opportunity to discuss anything about what it means to work with an egg donor in a confidential setting may offer information and guidance in how to move forward in the best possible way. This might very well be of benefit to the intended parents but could also very well impact the long-term emotional well being of your hoped for child.  It is essential to be well informed and view egg donation as an opportunity as opposed to the default option.

Discussion topics during a psychological consultation can vary based on need and interest. It can focus on your concerns, curiosities, or on general information on what we know about the well being of children born through the help of a donor.

Discussion points can focus on:

  • Sharing of information with family members
  • Disclosure of information…when and where?
  • Pros and cons of anonymity
  • Pros and cons of open arrangements
  • Bonding with your non-genetic child
  • Privacy as opposed to secrecy
  • Dealing with unresolved shame
  • Telling or not telling your child about their reproductive beginnings
  • Will your child love you if he/she knows
  • How much do I need to know about my donor
  • Future implications for the children born through egg donation

and much, much more….

The idea is to move forward with your family building plan from a place of strength, confidence, and excitement. Being informed and knowledgeable is key to a successful journey and a happy family.

Elaine R. Gordon, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychologist
1245 16th Street, Suite 210
Santa Monica, Ca 90404